Pre-Marital Counselling: What is it & How can it benefit my relationship?
Regardless of the stage you are at in your relationship, counselling can be incredibly helpful in learning how to reconnect and repair rifts or ruptures in relationships.
Relationships are inherently challenging, but society makes it seem that a healthy relationship is one with no conflict or difficulties.
While that may be true for some couples, disagreements and conflicts are generally inherent aspects of relationships and are totally understandable when bringing to separate and distinct individuals together, no matter how compelling and generally healthy the connection is.
Most of us, therapists included, did not receive education or healthy modelling about forming and maintaining healthy, mature and satisfying relationships. This is why we engage in training!
Through training, and the processes of pre-marital and couples counselling, we can learn how to reconnect during the normal process of distancing that naturally occur in most relationships.
With pre-marital counselling, we focus on creating a solid foundation for the relationship and partners to build and maintain skills and guidance to manage and grow together. When both partners are on the same page, it makes sorting through and processing challenges much more succinct and successful.
Most of us learn to suppress, or hide, our frustrations and discomforts in relationships. We tend to turn away from our partner and maybe turn towards friends or family for advice, or simply to vent about our frustration. It is very vulnerable, and potentially scary, to turn toward our partner, as they are the person we are most afraid of pushing away. True intimacy is what we are truly seeking, however we may not have the template or skills to face or raise our deepest discomfort. Our attachment injuries can get woken up in our adult romantic relationships and learning to reach for one another brings us to a powerful opportunity to explore, process and navigate together. That’s what we are here to help you with.
In pre-marital counselling, we are looking at the current foundation of the relationship and how that foundation may benefit from shifting and healthy change. What are your intentions for the present and future your relationship needs?
How are both partners showing up in the relationship? What are the contributions we are making, both healthy and potentially unhealthy?
What are your values and goals for a healthy bond? Have you identified or discussed this together or even thought about it individually?
What are your shared, or opposite, communication and interaction styles?
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for Couples identifies cycles of interaction and communication that start off challenging (bringing us in for counselling) and your therapist is here to help you create healthy new cycles to create and maintain the connection you are seeking.
Pre-marital counselling can be very effective, as existing or potential issues are being addressed and processed before too many years of ongoing struggle and emotional distance have passed. This is a proactive approach that can set a partnership up for success and deep, fulfilling, satisfying connection.
We are here to support and guide you towards co-creating the connection, unity and intimacy you are seeking.
To learn more about our couples and pre-marital counselling services, please email or call for a free 15 minute consultation or to book an appointment.
© Sunnyside Healing Arts, Inc. 2024